I Want To Remember...

Dear Bun,

As this pregnancy comes to an end, I wanted to capture a few of my favorite memories. It has been a joy to carry you these past 10 months. I am excited for the future, but I know I will miss this special time, when it has been just you and me. I can’t wait to show you the world, to explore with you, and to watch you make it your own, but there are things about you being in the womb that I want to remember as well:


I want to remember the nervous excitement that I felt when I first saw this:

I want to remember the look on your dad’s face when I told him he was going to be a father

I want to remember the emails that your dad and I would exchange over the work day. He was always checking in on us and I got so excited to see “Bun” in the subject line

I want to remember that Thursday’s were the best day because that is the day that we moved on to the next week, so I always spent some time on Thursday reading about what you were developing then

I want to remember that I loved reading product reviews on baby products

I want to remember that I poured my heart into your nursery and no matter how crazy my requests seemed, your dad just went right along with what I said

I want to remember that I actually liked wearing maternity clothes

I want to remember that your dad loved my pregnant belly

I want to remember the look on your dad’s face as the ultrasound technician waved her magic wand over my belly and said “It’s a boy!”

I want to remember that the first thing you received were 2 Michigan State onesies your dad brought back from a football game

I want to remember that Morgan got protective of us whenever another dog got too close

I want to remember that your dad loved catching me chugging milk. I could not get enough milk and once I decided I needed some milk, I would drink a full glass without stopping- it was that good

I want to remember the confidence in being a mom that came over me halfway through the pregnancy- all of a sudden it did not matter what anyone said or tried to advise me on. I realized that no one knows what is best for you like your dad and I, and we will work the rest of our lives to try and give you just that

I want to remember that you loved the right side and I frequently walked around with a lopsided belly

I want to remember that I played the “next time” game in my head the last few weeks- Next time I touch these diapers it will be because I am changing Henry, next time I have to get out my suitcase, it will be to pack for the hospital, next time I see my mom, I will be a mom, or the “by the time” game- By the time this milk expires, Henry should be born


I want to remember looking down at the scale at the doctor’s office. I have never seen a number so large when I stepped on a scale, but I have never been more proud of it